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Sunday, January 10, 2010

My Big Fat Indian Wedding

So, many of you (ok, ok, it was just two of y'all) have asked how John and I managed the whole multi-religion, multi-cultural thingamajig.

Officially? With grace and dignity and acceptance of all our differences.


Nah. We're running around like chickens with our heads cut off. That is OFF the record, of course.

Quick recap. I am a second generation Indian-American. Hubby's Dad is Italian. His Mom is Puerto-Rican.

Our babies are Quarter-Ricans.

Got it? Good.

And to make things more confusing, I will also tell you this. While I am the one who is Indian, this is what my husband looks like:

Yeah - I know. Straight out of Bollywood.* So, I understand if you are confused.

(*Friends, if you don't know what Bollywood is, you need to come to Masala Chica and we need to have a little talk, kaysies?)

Moving right along.

When people talk about how stressful wedding planning is, I usually have to yell a big "Hallelujah!" Even if they weren't talking to me, and were perhaps just talking about it on the train. You know, while I eavesdropped.

Because wedding planning is hard. Or as my daughter says, "It's HURD, Mommy."

But here is where I am going to try to one-up you. I promise I won't try to do this often. Just let me feel like I bear the bigger burden today. Deal?

Here is what most of my friends have had to work with:

1 Wedding
1 Dress
Many crazy relatives
Many crazy friends
1 crazy mom
1 reception hall
A limo

Here is what I had:

Long distance wedding (Lived in VA, had the wedding in NJ)
2 ceremonies
350 guests
3 caterers
3 devastating deaths in our family that year
1 asshole reception hall manager
3 wedding dresses
60 Crazy relatives
LOTS of drunk, out of state friends
And a partridge in a pair tree (seriously, it's part of the Indian ceremony).


So it was rough. I was a wreck. I cursed a lot. I drank even more. I forgot to eat. And I yelled at John every day.

All in all, it was a fairy tale. for Cinder-freaking-rella.

Anyway - here is kind of a pictorial recap. All pictures here are courtesy of my kickass wedding photographer, Jeffrey Vock.

Getting ready. At 5 AM. I was hungover from the rehearsal dinner. Can't tell? Good. Then I'm just kidding.

On the way to the church, getting pictures taken at the park

During the Catholic ceremony. I don't know what was so funny. But I looked like I could use a sandwich.

The Henna that had been meticulously painted on and had to dry for 10 hours on my hands the week of the wedding. This is the beautiful stain that remains.

My parents dancing because they will be rid of me after this day. People think I am joking, but this is very true. When John asked for their permission to marry me, my mother said, "Thank you, Thank you!" and burst into tears. John didn't know whether to say "You're Welcome" or run for the hills.

The barat (No, not BORAT. BARAT) - when the groom's family meets the bride's family. Usually people will get a horse or an Elephant for the groom. We got a Rolls Royce because I didn't want to have to deal with poop. (I kinda had my hands full at this point).

John got thrown around. Doesn't he look like Aladdin there?

My older sisters (two of my favorite women in the world) walked me in to the Indian ceremony.

My cute little toesies. They usually don't look this nice.
Looking down.
Yeah, definitely not.

I think someone just wacked me on the head with a flower. Thanks, Aaron Jackson. (350 guests and I still saw you do it).

After we were allowed to have our first drink that day. Notice my eyes have already started to glaze over.

Foxtrotting to "The Way You Look Tonight". If you know John, Sinatra was the only right choice.

Big Party. Lots of Dancing. The dance floor was full. Tables empty.

I got thrown around.

So did John. Again. (See Barat)

The Tarantella happened at some point.

Then I told everybody to go home. "Shoo!" I said.
Ok, I didn't but if I did, would you blame me? Aren't you tired just looking at 1/100th of my wedding pictures?

Yes, my photographer gave me 1500 pictures. He shot in film.

For those of you who only know digital and don't even know what 1500 film shots MEANS, all I have to say is, it's CUH-RAZY.

So going back to how we do this whole multi-cultural thingamajig? It's a lot like what our wedding looked like.

It's absolute chaos and makes me 100% certifiable EVERY DAY.

But I wouldn't have it any other way.



DG at Diary of a Mad Bathroom said...

It looked like a scene out of a movie. We are a multi cultural/multi religious/multi crazy family too. I think it's more the norm these days, which is a very good thing.

MiMi said...

Seriously, that looks like a freakin' movie! Love this's so crazy how you made it all work. And seriously? You guys are gorgeous. Seriously!

Monique-aka-Surferwife23 said...

I feel like barf. (I just got back from a 4 mile run, so don't take it personal). You two are SO attractive it makes me want to to barf a little. He really is Aladdin and you are Jasmine.

Hang on. I will call Haley over to confirm.

She did.

And I almost spit my water out while reading about Barat/Borat! classic.

Vodka Logic said...

You two are gorgeous. Both weddings are beautiful.

I have always wanted to go to an Indian wedding. All the colorful clothing and it just looks fun.

Ams said...

Gorgeous lady! I don't know how you did it.
Your hubby seriously looks Indian. He looks MORE Indian than my man... I should send you pics. Most people thing he is Italian or something like that... kills me.

I don't know how you survived the wedding. But one day, should I marry the man of my dreams (you know, the guy that I am with now!) I am going to be coming to you for advice because I don't know how to do the Indian wedding... it scares me!!!

Beautiful pictures... you two are a gorgeous couple!

Shell said...

It must have been crazy to have to plan all that, but OMG, what fabulous pics!

Mommy Taylor said...

Seriously, how freakin cute are you guys?! The wedding pictures are gorgeous! Looks like A LOT of work went into it. And here I was thinking that putting my wedding together in 5 days was stressful. You win. :)

Oh My Goddess said...

You two are meant for each other!

I can tell what great people you are just from your pictures. You can't make that up!

Too funny, your mom did not say thank you!?! Hilarious!

Karlosophies said...

Sounds, and looks, as though you organised a wedding festival (not just a wedding). Stunning pics... you look absolutely stunning and blissfully happy! Which reminds me - check my blog.

Vivianne's Vista said...

It looks absolutely beautiful. Both of you were gorgeous. Kudos to you for pulling it off so well!

Anna See said...

loved, loved, loved these! i don't have a single good wedding pic. ugh. you 2 look like movie stars!

watched bridezilla last night and was captivated by the train wreck of brides on it. I KNOW you weren't like that.

thanks for such a fun post!

Sara Plays House said...

Beautiful. Lovely. And yes, chaotic, but in such a GOOD way.
Now I want to be you. Not in a creepy stalker way.

But if you see movement outside your window, it's more than likely me. I'll get Avery to be my look out.

Wendy said...

Love this post! Looks like lots of fun chaos that ended beautifully!

Masala Chica said...

Guys thanks for the lovely compliments. The wedding was 4 1/2 years ago. I remembered how to eat shortly afterwards and so did John so we don't look QUITE like that right about now.

Sara - i love that I have a stalker. now i feel legit. (j/k - kind of).

Beth said...

Awww! I'm a sucker for a love story with a happy ending.

Sarah said...

Beautiful pics! we did the whole Asian/White thingie as well. One wedding in CT. with 180 people; one Chinese reception in Houston with 450 people. Luckily there was a month in between each - and I had to do nothing for the Houston/Asian one (besides getting fitted for a dress). My mother in law went nuts! She loves talking about how people in Houston are still talking about it. Gotta love Chinese MIL's.
I have an award for you over on my blog!!

Kate@And Then I Was a Mom said...

Wow. You are one good-looking pair. And as for the eye-glazing thing, you really can't tell. You are obviously a girl who can hold her licker.

We did a multifaith wedding, too, with both a rabbi and priest. The rabbi was a real crack-up and the priest was kind of boring. By the end, you could tell all the Catholics were seriously considering converting.

Lemon Gloria said...

I love this! Thank you for sharing pictures!

The Only Girl said...

WOW! Gorgeous but crazy! LOVE the henna. And your dresses. And you! You were a very beautiful bride (and your hubby aint's so bad either!)

Shandal said...

Your wedding looks so elegant and very lovely. I love all of those photos. I can see how it was all very stressful, but it truly looked like a perfect day.
That one pic of John being thrown around, my fist thought was Aladdin. Then I read your caption and LOLed.
You made a gorgeous bride and you have a very handsome groom.
Aren't you glad you had an awesome photographer to capture all of those priceless moments? High five to him!

Ruby said...

ok ok you take the cake. i had it easy only a court wedding and bam the parents sent us away lol I have yet to marry thru church i too am catholic but dh must convert first so far i have him asking 1001 questions about everything.. i think hes scared lol
anyways you weddings look amazing and how better to celebrate then with ton of people that love and care about you

Maven said...

You are my new favourite blogger.

Mommakin said...

Oh my goodness, these are SO beautiful!

Glennon said...

best. wedding. ever.

Erin said...

Okay Marsala,

I popped over from Sarah's blog (Stroller Ballet) and I'm already hooked. About to become your newest follower. I am ROFLMAO re: Monique's comment on this post---about your being Jasmine and Hubs is Aladdin. SO true. You two are so HAWT. Gorgeous pics, thanks for sharing.

I think we have some of the same followers, so I'm sad I'm just now "meeting" you!

Anonymous said...

Amazing pics....
It indeed does look like the pics are screeshots of a popular Bollywood flick...
Very intersting :-)

Sonia said...

Hey Kiran! This is Sonia from - happened to see this post and loved reading the behind the scenes wedding details =) So happy we were able to feature your wedding on our site - it's helped so many of our readers! Hope you guys are doing well =)

Alisa said...

That is fantastic! Looks like a movie!

Caroline said...

I am so jealous . . . I am still waiting to attend my first Indian wedding. I have heard they are AMAZING! Your photographs are BEAUTIFUL!

ezPhotoInvitations said...

Love the post. Your wedding pics are fantastic! Wow and I' thought our Italian/Newfie wedding was nuts!

WAHM and Mommy Blogger

Stephanie Faris said...

Now THAT is a nice wedding. I've already done the big wedding when I got engaged this time and people started talking about photographers and caterers and such, I freaked a little. We're doing an all-inclusive wedding in the mountains. I seriously want to just show up with the dress and do it. I don't want to fool with anything...but even that isn't as easy as it sounds. I'm dealing with registering, figuring out where to have our reception (a "simple" dinner at a nearby restaurant after the ceremony) and dealing with bridesmaids' dresses. Luckily I found my dress right away so that part is through.

You made a BEAUTIFUL bride!

Jessica said...

Crazy, maybe, but OH so beautiful!

Kate said...

The henna is just SO beautiful. I have always been jealous of my Indian-American friends who get the henna treatment for their weddings. Do you think it would be OK for a Swamp Yankee white girl to take on that tradition? :)

Salt said...

Yes you definitely win. The next time I start feeling in any way overwhelmed with our wedding plans, I'm coming back here and reading this blog.

Your pictures are FAH-BULOUS. And could you be any prettier? Ummm I think not.

PS. Yes he totally looks like Aladdin in that one photo.

Heather said...

Thank you for sharing . . . beautiful pictures! Found your blog through SurferWife and I love it!

Kristin said...

Ohhhhhhhhhh yay! I loved seeing these pics. You guys are a gorgeous couple. No wonder the munchkin is so beautiful!

The girl with the flour in her hair said...

I stumbled over here from the Stroller Ballet and I have to say WOW! What amazing pictures and what an amazing ceremony (ies)! I don't think I've ever seen a wedding where so many people are having fun. It's beautiful.

kys said...

Ok, are you really a Bollywood couple? This blog is research for a new movie isn't it?

Daya said...

I stumbled over from Lilu's blog, and I'm glad I did!
Anyway, I'm a 2nd Gen Indian American as well, and I loved your pics... clearly your parents are cooler than mine bc right now a multicultural/racial wedding is proving to be an uphill battle for me!

Nahl said...

First of all you're realllllyyy pretty. Like Gauri Khan pretty. I hope you're well aware of bollywood, and all it's stars' families, but just in case you're not, she's Shah Rukh Khan's wife. And to think shah rukh khan was the only famous one in his family.
Secondly, you're really really funny.
Thirdly, your husband's kinda hot. Did I just say that?

Masala Chica said...

Nahl - of course I know who they are - I did grow up on bollywood. Someone had told my husband a while ago that his wife looked like Gauri Khan, so he even know who she is. I don't think so - she is in another realm, but I dig the compliment :-)

I will tell my husband you think he is hot - since you are in karachi - i won't be threatened ;-)


Anonymous said...

Ohhh mann....I definitely understand looking like I am straight out of Bollywood. And BIG SURPRISE I am 3 Quarter Rican... the rest Italian. I guess that mix makes for a sort of Arab/Indian/Asian type look haha.

and I thought I had MY hands full with multi cultural differences dating a black guy.

roma said...

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Rach (DonutsMama) said...

This is great. I just found your blog so I'm a little late to the party, but just wanted to say that we did our weddings the same way too!


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